It's written in the stars
Dear Helen,
Here is your horoscope for Friday, August 11...
Sagittarius:
"Some people think you're only about fun and games, but they simply don't realize that all your clowning has a much higher purpose. That includes finding ways to please yourself and help others. "
It's totally true. I know I you feel better knowing that there's someone out there way, WAY more retarded than you. And I laugh while I masturbate.
You're welcome.
Here is your horoscope for Friday, August 11...
Sagittarius:
"Some people think you're only about fun and games, but they simply don't realize that all your clowning has a much higher purpose. That includes finding ways to please yourself and help others. "
It's totally true. I know I you feel better knowing that there's someone out there way, WAY more retarded than you. And I laugh while I masturbate.
You're welcome.
posted by Helen the Felon at 1:54 PM
9 Comments:
Masturbation is the new pink.
Okay...so if masturbation is the new pink, and Pink is the New Blog, it follows logically that Masturbation is the New Blog.
Thing is, blogging at work is passable. Masturbation...not so much. Guess I'll have to learn to be quiet about it.
I'm a sagitarius and I never laugh rubbing one out, even at work.
If you laugh while during masturbation, I don't think that you are doing it right. I am not sayin', I am just sayin'.
As soon as I read your horoscope I just knew you were going to have a bit about masturbation :D
Am sure you can figure out how to get away with it at work. You're a smart woman. Maybe you should explore that - more fodder for the blog perhaps?
And I totally forgot to ask - If masturbation is the new pink, what's the new black?
Passive Aggressive Fear is the New Black.
You know what would make me happy? To find out what that fershlugginer secret photo project you were going on about is, that's what!
Ah - such uplifting advice. Enjoy the self-flagellation...
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